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Question   v2.9 September 2000
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v2.9 September 2000
Table of Contents
0. Introduction.
1. DreamHost 2 Announcement.
2. DHSOTM Round-up.
3. Sixth Visor Contest Winner.
4. Anita's Tips.
5. Dedication.
6. Conclusion and Random Quotes From newdream.net.

0.      Introduction.

            Finally, September has begun poking his toes out from
underneath the fluffy, warm blankets of a whole year's worth of sleep. 
Testing the temperature, trying to decide if it is actually time to wake
up, or if he can afford to stretch his foot all the way out from beneath
its protective case and pound on the snooze button with his big toe for
a few more moments of blissful dreamtime.  He tells himself it is not
yet fall and that "technically" the season doesn't have to pass for at
least a few more days... and then August bursts into the once quiet, cozy
bedroom.  She slams on the blinding, bedroom lights and tells September
he better wake up and get fall going before it is too late and the whole
year is thrown out of season.  September is quite sure at this point
that in a past life August was a drill sergeant, the best of the best he
thinks...   September moans his response, knowing that August is telling
the truth.  He hates it when she wakes him up like that.  If she was in
a better mood he might have sweetly asked her for a cup of creamy,
delicious coffee, but he knew he had missed his shot at that by pressing
the snooze button on his alarm clock for the fourth time (obviously, the
straw that broke the camel's back... ).  And so, September tosses away the
covers knowing the time for rest has passed.  No luck turning back the
hand of time so far.  The fall season has taken its chilly turn and with
it comes DreamHost's monthly edition of the Newsletter.  Good luck to
you all trying to wake your kids up for school, and for all the kids
trying to wake up for school too!!  Here we go, hang on to your
backpacks buckaroos (and hang on to that lunch money if possible)!!!! 
Good luck back at Columbia Sarah, we miss you around here!!

1.      DreamHost 2 Announcement.

And now the announcement you've all been waiting for (well, most of you
anyways). DreamHost 2 is now officially in operation! Let the
celebration commence!! Yes, thanks to the efforts of our development
team (Who can be recognized on the street by the dark, under-eye circles
and the disgruntled looks on their girlfriends and wives faces.  Relax
my sisters the hard part is done.), along with the assistance of our
hardworking (and thankfully patient) customers who were willing to be
the guinea pigs -  uh whoops; I mean uh, beta testers (hee hee) the new
system has been implemented and mostly debugged.  We still appreciate
your comments though, as we are continuing to make improvements and also
adding features as necessary.  Thanks for the continuing effort to make
DreamHost services #1 in the industry (yes, some call me cocky, but I
prefer the term positively motivated through mental visualization... ).  

So the majority of our dear DreamHostee friends may be wondering what
this means to them.  Right? Well get your notepads ready...  it means many
various treasures at your disposal.  Your service plans will remain the
same save for the new, nifty extras that you will be receiving for the
same prices you have been paying.  The DreamHost powers that be have
decided to keep the price freeze in effect to reward our loyal friends
for their patience and continued support.  The prices have gone up a bit
on the DH2 system plans due to all the added features.  This won't
affect your rates unless you change your plan after you have been moved
over to the new DH2 system.  Basically, our amazingly cool and dedicated
customers (Hey that is you right?!) will receive all the fancy new
features at current prices.  

We have been through a long (well, it seems long to me for some odd
reason, I am a bit odd if you haven't noticed... ) creative process that we
have taken on together.  You have been more than patient and actually
essential in our development process for DH2.  We have all worked on
this together.  Your comments and even support questions have helped us
to add features to the new DH2 system that I think will benefit our
whole web community.  (Yes, Sarah thinks that I am goofy for using the
term "web community", but she also calls me [ever so lovingly mind you]
a "dirty hippie." Hmmm... food for thought I guess...  Ahhh the youth of
America... kinda scary when it isn't you anymore!!) We improve with your
help.  Yes, those development team members with more than enough gray
matter than is natural for human beings, and the endurance of 3
superheroes each have been typing their little fingers to the bone.  All
of our efforts done in the name of the creative process, and the desire
to be the best web host ever known to our planet.  We have done this
together and hope that the price freeze and the added free features will
suffice for now, as the evidence of our undying gratitude to our friends

  So if you would like to get on the list to be moved over to the new
system please go to this URL: https://secure.newdream.net/admin/waitlist.cgi
and thank you for your patience.  We will be moving these customers over
on a 1st come 1st serve basis.  It should take around a month to get
this going so pack a lunch... ( he he I've always wanted to say that!)  You
can review the current status of the DH2 migration at any time from the
old web panel (https://secure.newdream.net/admin) by clicking the
DreamHost 2.0 link at the top.

2.      DHSOTM Roundup.

Ok, you know em, you love em, this month's site of the month award goes
to  Jay David and Harsh Patel for their web site, http://www.final.nu/
which is full of interesting stuff, artistic pictures, music, and some
really cool design aspects.  It is very colorful and is loaded with
pages of interesting information.  I am big on the special effects, and
this site has plenty to entertain.  Don't just take my word for it (I am
often entertained with shiny objects), stop by their site and decide for

Excellent work guys, and congratulations on a job well done!!!

3.      Sixth Visor Contest Winner.

If anyone has any suggestions, btw, you can still enter them at the web
panel, I am hoping for a suggestion as to how I can win this little Palm
Pilot goody myself.  This month's winner of the DreamHost Visor Contest
is going to be Niclas Johannesen  who hosts the site
http://www.lenamusic.com/ here at DreamHost.  This site is definitely
one that you should check out.  I am particularly fond of the "Journal"
section.  It speaks the truth baby!! Also you can listen to some cool
tunes and and entertain your eyes with the photography.    I will be
emailing you to see if we have the proper mailing address so that your
prize won't get misplaced into my truck. (I want it! I want it! I won't
stop until I get my way!)

O.K. Bob, tell them what they have won!!! An all expenses paid trip to
pocket organizer land!!!  A Handspring Visor! A palm-compatible handheld
organizer that comes in DreamHost blue, and even has an expansion pack
in the back.  See the web site at http://www.handspring.com/ . We're 
giving away one blue visor deluxe a month for the rest of the year, so 
if you are lucky you'll be the next big winner!!

4.      Anita's Tips.

After close to ten years in the food and beverage service industry I
have come to believe in a thing called Tip Karma.  Basically summarized,
Tip Karma is pretty much reaping what you sow.  Even now the idea that I
must send out the kind of tips that I myself would like to receive
permeates my being (seriously).  Anyway, just remember this: one
person's idea of a "phat tip" is another person's "chump change", try to
make yours the first choice - but realize it is all relative to your
perspective as well as that of the rest of the world.

Tip # 1 
Avoid getting too close to the guys in the mosh pit.  Especially if they
have an evil grin as they stare at you, the whole while getting closer
to your unsuspectingly friendly noggin, their sneaky fist clenched and
ready to make you see stars (for those of you who have never been
blindsided with a right hook from a guy that could be the next World
Wrestling Federation Champ, that whole stars flying around the head
thing in cartoons is actually pretty accurate - however I just seemed to
see one great big star!!). Some people are just mean, keep an eye out
for them and try to steer clear!! 

Tip # 2
Do not, I repeat do not put your little brother into the dryer for any
reason! Even if your best friend convinces you that he would be the best
candidate to test run because he is tougher, being that he is a boy (she
would never say anything like that now, but when we were young it seemed
to make perfect sense) it just isn't gonna work out.  Trust me on this
one!!  You will have to endure the guilt of the memory for the rest of
your life.  Those tormented cries to shut off the dryer will haunt you
for the rest of your days.  And when you are older he still won't laugh
about it.  So, no matter how articulate the argument in favor of using
the brother for experimentation might be, go with your gut and tell your
buddy "No Way Jose".  I realized many years later that my friend was
actually retaliating for all the times my brother used to pull her
pigtails.  Then how bad would you feel?  Like Fredo in the Godfather,
that is how you'd feel... 

5.      Dedication.

This month I would like to acknowledge the power of some good ol' pants
splittin' laughter.  I make the long trek to work in Los Angeles at
least 5 days per week.  I have noticed that in the past few months I
have begun to despise selfish drivers.  I have subjected my carpool
buddies to much anger and negativity about the other drivers on the
freeway.  I mean I get pretty close to road rage, I haven't actually
tried to "pop a cap" in anyone's behind yet, but I would be less than
honest if I didn't tell you that my language isn't quite ladylike when I
drive.  I believe that I have found a solution to my anger, and that is
laughter.  The last guy that deliberately cut me off was such a jerk
about the whole thing, that my little brother (yes, he is ok, he
survived the "dryer incident" with just a few minor abrasions and only
moderate damage to his psyche) just started cracking jokes about the guy
(** Special Note - If the guy hears you making fun of him in this
interaction it may not be the epiphany for you that it was for me,
because you may end up on the wrong end of the road rage... ) next thing I
knew I was trying to wipe the tears of laughter away while holding in
the urine that was desperately trying to escape my body.  And the jokes
just kept on - when my brother, Alex, is on a roll watch out because
Charlie's Angels (and I'm talking about ALL the Angels) couldn't stop
this wild one.  Then the commuter in the Volkswagen creeping along
beside us in the next lane hears the conversation and starts to laugh
(see it is not just me, the driver cutting people off is known as a jerk
to all).  Pretty soon we were all just laughing and having a great time
in rush hour traffic.  To me it was pretty much a miracle.  I didn't
feel angry anymore.  At that point I could care less about the punk who
was driving like a lunatic.  The best part was that I felt good the
whole day.  And the great part is that the following days of my commute
have been better than ever.  When I start to get grumpy and my back
begins to tingle when the congestion on the freeway is about to make my
blood pressure skyrocket, I ask my brother to tell me a funny story, or
do a monologue that we both really like.  I start to laugh and it really
seems to get better.   So this installment of the DreamHost Newsletter
is dedicated to laughter.  It is keeping me from committing homicide in
L.A., so I bet it'll do something for you too.  Try to laugh about
something this month and let me know if it improves your life or if I am
ready for the padded room instead.

6.      Conclusion and Random Quotes From newdream.net.

Diarrhea of the mouth you say doc?  Yes, I would have to agree with your
diagnosis.  So faked you out on the conclusion - Go! Live a life and be
free, after you read the quotes for the month.  

*Any great truth can -- and eventually will -- be expressed as a cliche
-- a cliche is a sure and certain way to dilute an idea. For instance,
my grandmother used to say, "The black cat is always the last one off
the fence." I have no idea what she meant, but at one time, it was
undoubtedly true. --
                       Solomon Short

 *One thing they don't tell you about doing experimental physics is that
sometimes you must work under adverse conditions... like a state of
sheer terror. -- W.K. Hartmann 

*When a child is taught ... its programmed with simple instructions --
and at some point, if its mind develops properly, it exceeds the sum of
what it was taught, thinks independently. -- Dr. Richard Daystrom, "The
Ultimate Computer", stardate 4731.3.

*I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the
places they do today. -- Will Rogers

*volcano, n.: A mountain with hiccups.


Last updated: Jan 27, 2001.