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Question   v2.11 November 2000
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v2.11 November 2000
Table of Contents
0. Introduction.
1. DreamHost 2, yup.
2. DHSOTM Round-up.
3. Eighth Visor Contest Winner.
4. Anita's Tips.
5. Random Quotes From newdream.net.
---------------------------------------------------------------


0.      Introduction.

Welcome one and all to this most hallowed of traditions, the DreamHost
newsletter! For those of you who've read one before, glad to have you
back, and if this is your first time, glad to have you front. Actually,
there are lots of you receiving this for the first time this month. 
First, there are the seven hundred of you who signed up since our last 
newsletter was sent out at the end of October. Second, there is everyone 
else who signed up for DreamHost 2 since it went live in early September! 
That's right, this is the first newsletter that is being sent to 
everybody from DreamHost 1 AND DreamHost 2. With so many newcomers it's 
probably a good idea to go over some ground rules:

one: EVERYBODY gets the newsletter. It's just once a month, we don't send
you any other junk or give your email address to anybody else to send you
junk, and it's funny.

two: There's no way to unsubscribe as long as your account with us is 
active. Please continue to rule three if this is your second time reading 
this. See rule one. 

three: This newsletter, plus all earlier ones, is available online at
https://panel.dreamhost.com/index.cgi?tab=home&subtab=news for DH2
and at https://secure.newdream.net/admin/newsletters/ for DH1.

four: This newsletter is how we get the word out about what's going
on over here at DreamHost and New Dream Network every month. We try to
do something, anything, at least once a month.

five: Do not talk about the newsletter. Not to ANYBODY. I'm serious.

Now that we've got those rules out of the way, I can get on with the funny
part of the introduction.

Our number one goal these days at DreamHost World Headquarters is to
merge our loyal DreamHost 1 customers with our cutting-edge DreamHost 2
system. It's only a matter of time before convergence is complete. Our
goal is to have everyone moved by the end of the millenium. Sadly, we might
not quite make this goal. But we will be extremely close! If we miss it by 
a little, I give my solemn, personal, guarantee that we will DEFINITELY 
have everyone moved over by the end of the next millenium.

A lot of things are converging these days it seems. It's a hot topic in 
today's consumer electronics media for sure. If it's not internet-enabled 
telephones it's flash ICQ. If it's not television LANs it's email GPS. And 
if it's not peer-to-peer DVDs it's DreamHost one to DreamHost two. It's an
exciting time to be alive!


1. DreamHost 2, yup.

Speaking of DreamHost 2.. for those of you already on it and just getting 
this newsletter for the first time, consider yourself lucky! You're all set.

For everybody else still trying to get moved over, you can keep up to the 
minute with where you are on our move list, how many people we've moved over,
and all that through the DH1 web panel at:
https://secure.newdream.net/admin/waitlist.cgi

Like that cute poster with the wet cat says, "Hang in there!"


2. DHSOTM Round-up.

This month's big honking prize of a cool little logo to put on your site 
telling everyone how you were DreamHost's Site of the Month goes to In 
Passing... http://www.inpassing.org/ . It's sorta like a regularish web-log
kind of a site, but every entry is something funny the author heard in 
passing that day. Here's an example:

"You know, Dad's not made of money." 
--A very serious 5 year old, to her mother who was trying on footwear in 
the shoe department of Macy*s. 

Do you get it now? It's pretty cute and updated all the time it looks like
with a big archive. Bored with this newsletter already? Head on over there.

And if you're wondering how YOU can win the DHSOTM award, I've got one of
two answers for you. If you're DH1, https://secure.newdream.net/admin/dhsotm.cgi
is the place to be. If you're DH2, uh well there is no DHSOTM program set up
yet. But convergence is nigh.


3. Eighth Visor Contest Winner.

Don't forget our current giveaway running from now until the end of the
year!  We're giving away one Handspring Visor a month (they're palm-pilot
compatible organizers that come in DreamHost blue!) to some lucky guy or
gal, as per the official rules at http://www.dreamhost.com/contest/

We haven't announced to the winner yet who they are, and we do know it is
somebody who is receiving this newsletter. So therefore, keep reading to
see if it is YOU who won this month's Visor (a $269 value)! 

And the winner is... Jason Davis! Way to go, Jason! We'll be emailing you
soon to verify your shipping info and make sure everything is nice and
kosher! 

Keep on referring people and keep on adding services and keep on sending
index cards to up your chances in our great Visor giveaway! 

I just realized that this is going to be a regular section of the
newsletter for the next month, so I've rewritten it in a way to make 
it easy to cut and paste for next time without much modification! Heck, 
maybe instead of spending all this time writing the newsletter each 
month I should spend it writing a script that generates newsletters... 


4.      Anita's Tips

Send out a tip and get one back.  The idea of "Tip Karma", is to give
to the world and know that you will receive something of value back.
Back in the days when I was a young food server a very kind pair of
former employers came in to have dinner with their children.  They found
that I was attending college and trying to make a career for myself.  My
only dilemma was how to get the tuition money.  That very evening, I
received a tip on a $20.00 bill that more than paid for my tuition and
left a bit extra for me to enjoy as well.  That night I went home with
hundreds of dollars in my apron and a rather large grin spread across my
face.  So, now that I am no longer of the food server trade, I still feel 
the need to pass out my own tips. Hope one helps you as they have all 
helped me.

Tip # 1
Keep Stompers Away From Your Hair!!!!!  This can be especially dangerous
if you have long hair.  Some of you may wonder what a Stomper is.  It is
a cute little battery powered machine that drives on its own power
wherever you choose to point it.  The kind I am thinking of in
particular resembles a tiny version of a monster truck.  Once this guy
is on his path there is no stopping him.  So if he was positioned, oh
say, by your little brother on a direct course for your head, it would
roll right through until the darling gears became unmovable because your
hair has wrapped around each miniature axel and tire.  It would, at that
time, make a strange sound that is very similar to the one emitted when
equipment comes to a grinding halt due to a malfunction.  You might hear
a young girl sobbing in the background as her father tells her he must
CUT the Stomper from her hair.  I say again - 
Keep Stompers Away From Your Hair!!!!!


5.    Random Quotes From newdream.net.

Gravity brings me down.

The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed 
ideas in the mind at the same time and still retain the ability to 
function. -- F. Scott Fitzgerald 

Avoid cliches like the plague. They're a dime a dozen.

Heuristics are bug ridden by definition. If they didn't have bugs, then 
they'd be algorithms. 

--Josh

Last updated: Jan 27, 2001.